infinitepossibilities

earlier this year, our boss visited us here in the ph. his visit was rather uneventful until i heard him announced this while looking at me, "you will relocate to manila. you might need to stay there for seven months." i was able to hold my lacrimal glands in check. i got teary-eyed, sure, but i didn’t shed a tear - luckily. after the said meeting, the other TLs informed me that i didn’t hear our boss quite correctly. according to them, he didn’t say "seven" months, but rather he said "several" months. oh, okay.. what now? could i handle living in the capital on my own? what will happen to my mission mactan? who would facilitate the many things that need to be done to keep my mission mactan going as planned? to whom do i entrust my mission to bring it into fruition? could i actually ask my officemate the huge favor? wouldn’t i be asking too much? what would happen to my plans? should i drop them altogether because my boss gave me a direct order? could i still take my palawan trip this coming february 16? what about my kids? do i really have to prepare for it? how will my beautiful uterus react? can i find a good OB there? is it really going to happen? what?????

DENIAL. it wouldn’t happen. i’m sure of it.

i’m prematurely announcing it in the hopes that it wouldn’t happen. it’s just one of those plans of his that don’t come to fruition. there’s still hope it wouldn’t happen. on the other hand, my logical mind recognized the seriousness of the order. there’s no going back on his word.

since he gave the order, my heartbeat would quicken the moment there’s an invitation to accept a conference among us TLs and another representative. prior to clicking OK, i would say a hurried prayer, "ayaw itugot, lord."

yet, the other part of me WANTED THE CHALLENGE. in three months time, i would have stayed in the company for six years now. i could definitely use the change in scenery and [the biggest come on to me] the opportunity to explore LUZON would be made more feasible if i work there. this is definitely a huge break to my rather predictable life. anyway, i have a friend who lives in the capital now. so, i could easily drop by their house and visit her and the family.

Mein, i’m going to miss so many people. ha, if i could feel the loneliness here when i’m surrounded with friends, how much more if i don’t know anyone there????

i’m still undecided whether i want IT or NOT should the order becomes final.

late in the afternoon, i learned that brian is currently in the PH. brian is my immediate boss as far as projects are concerned. he is in manila and won’t be back until thursday. the reaction to this news was more of gladness.

does it mean, the plan for my transfer wouldn’t happen?

is he training the people there now? thus, there’s no need for me to go there.

yay!!! i just hope so.

well, a little part of me wants the experience, too.