26
Feb
09

after ordeal gratitude

the general feeling is one of lethargy. the lack of

energy is draining the sap out of me. i’m very much

aware that i won’t die of my condition. i’m very much

aware that there are people who are much sicker

than me. as my friend pointed out, in this relative

world, i should take comfort in the fact that there are

others who are in much deep shit than i am [hehe, i

could not remember the words verbatim - but that

was the gist of it]. well, i recognize the truth in her

words, but sometimes exhaustion just kicks in.

currently, i have a mind that is very much willing to

fight and emerge victorious, yet my body is

screaming for everything to just stop - the

headaches, the intermittent pain - the blood flow. it’s

weird why i’m feeling them now when i’ve no reason

to. i’m already into my 7th day of withdrawal

bleeding, and from 12 soaked pads a day, i’ve

reduced to just 5. i also stop popping painkillers 

today to test if i can go through the motions of my

everyday life without depending on them. so far, i’m

not feeling any pain in my pelvic area, just the nasty

headache. everything is looking good, yet i can’t

successfully convince myself that i’m hundred

percent fine. i blame it on my pale lips. haha, i’ve

bitten them several times today but it only works for

a few minutes and them lips are back to being pale.

i guess, i should avoid mirrors today and cross my

fingers that nobody would comment about them

being pale…hehe, people - i have to shed off my

very thick uterine lining - every inch of those lining,

thus - the too much blood discharge and yeah, the

pale lips…

anyway, pale lips aside - i wish to thank all the

friends i bothered the past few days. believe me

guys, your indulging my “thinking aloud” messages

helped me get through my pain. achinette kong, i’m

thankful that i finally listened to you to go see your

doctor. she was truly a great help as she’s the first

doctor i’ve had in years whom i can call or text when

my symptoms are at its worst. thanks also to the one

who causes pain and pleasure for talking nonsense

to me and for introducing jamal malik. hehe, it sure

was a great distraction and a tremendous help. let

me apologize also for doing the wrong thing one

night. i just didn’t know better.




3 Responses to “after ordeal gratitude”


  1. 1    dont-throw-garbage-at-me February 27, 2009 at 4:15 am

  2. 2    dont-throw-garbage-at-me February 27, 2009 at 4:25 am

    Oh, f*ck, sorry about the first one. Can’t link. Here’s my formal complaint.

    MEMORANDUM

    To: Mother Nature

    CC: God (The Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit), Allah, Buddha, Shiva, Oprah Winfrey

    Date: 11.21.08

    Re: Optional Menstruation
    _____________________________________________________________

    As a female who is opting not to have children through vaginal birth or caesarian section, I would like to formally lodge a complaint against the presence of my menstrual cycle. It is a frivolous and needless monthly exercise and I urge you to reconsider its inclusion in my anatomy. Oh, and PMS too as it’s not doing me any favors either.

    Now I do think that under the right circumstances, menses is a noble process in that it paves the way for babies to reside in the uterus. However, I do not believe it should be a “factory-installed” feature.

    Consider this: If I were buying a stove, I can opt not to purchase a model with the self-cleaning mechanism. If the likes of Best Buy can offer me freedom of choice, certainly you can too, Mother Nature.

    As it stands, your current policy makes the assumption that all women want to reproduce. Now, I don’t mean to lecture you, Mother Nature, but you know what happens when you assume, don’t you? In this particular case, it creates a legion of cramped, bloated and irritable (childless) females hell-bent on making you pay for their misery, in addition to the whole making asses out of you and me business.

    While males historically have been responsible for destroying some of your more well-received handiwork, i.e. the fouling of pristine Alaskan coastline in the Exxon-Valdez oil spill. That’s just conjecture on my part but still, I think it’s worthy of your consideration.

    While I have the floor, here are some other bodily systems/functions I think you should consider making optional and/or on-demand:

    * Ear wax
    * Phlegm
    * Flatulence
    * Diarrhea

    Since humans spend millions in pharmacies each year on products to control/reduce/rid ourselves of these often-embarrassing extras, perhaps you should consider this a unanimous rejection of them.

    I realize this request is a tall order but I propose speeding up the process of natural selection as a work-around until the Menstrual On/Off Switch is developed, tested and introduced into the species. Another possibility is a massive uterus donation drive. I’ll gladly sign mine over to a barren woman. Seriously, take my healthy ovaries, please.

    Thank you for your time

    Sincerely,

    Dulce (the one you sort of goofed up on).

  3. 3    decrechoice March 6, 2009 at 8:18 pm

    hi dulce!! thanks for dropping by. yeah, i’ve read this post sometime back and i almost fell off my seat laughing… it was such a well-composed complaint and i totally agree with you on the factory default.. yeah, women should be given the option if they want their rep system activated or not…

    hopefully, the jokester will hear of your complaint and act on it… SOON!!

Leave a Reply

You must login to post a comment.