infinitepossibilities

i perfectly know that it’s no longer cute. but what can i do? i’m currently in excruciating pain. AGAIN. i curse this pain with all of my breath. it’s so unfair to be feeling this much pain. yes, ive been through this before, i should probably be used to it by now… well, i can argue that — but when i’m currently feeling the pain - it doesnt matter what i’ve been through the previous months. each pain is different somehow. i’m feeling it now and i’m hating every bit of it. my doc advised me before to just deal with the pain since it’s my necessary evil. there’s not much i can do for it except bear it and hope for  the best.  an  hour before i popped one  ponstan sf 500 mg. i dont seem to experience any relief so i popped another one… it’s probably this that lead some of the addicts to try heavy dose drugs. i can so relate to house right now. if only i’ve something to kill the pain… i’ve probably taken it without batting an eyelash. i’m probably in too real a pain that i’m actually considering illegal drugs. good thing i dont have access to it coz really i’m tempted right now to try anything. i’ve spammed he-who-causes-pain-and-pleasure’s phone just a few moments back. well, he’s choosing to ignore me. i can’t blame him… he needn’t have to deal with my pain. so it’s also unfair of me to expect something from him at this hour.  anyway, i’m just tapping the keys to distract me from the pain. i wish i could just sleep the pain off, but with its intensity i doubt if sleep is an option for me too…